How long does it take to get pregnant? (Diary Page 7)
It is such a blessing to have my mom's place and my office close by. Unlike others, I have the privilege of meeting my parents every day. My work starts with their blessings. Before I head to the resort building, I catch up with them daily. The first question Mom asked me today was why was I so upset. She knew that it was the first day of my period, but my expression gave her some other clues. I told her what was going on, and about the planning and failing loop.
She was elated to know that finally, we had started planning at least. She immediately got salt and meri Nazar utari. Mom didn't have much to add. But she told me that they tried for 6-7 months before I was conceived. And she told me about some other aunties too. Most of them had taken a long time to conceive, barring only two close aunts who were pregnant at the very first try. Well, not bad to know that I was not alone! As it turned out, all those morning odd thoughts were unnecessary.
I rushed to the office after our brief talk. It's June and we are in the winding phase of summer camps and preparing for the monsoons. It was another busy month for our resort. The kids spend more time at the pool and the recreational amenities before their schools reopen. Parents often accompany the kids, making it a very busy affair for us.
After a crazy busy day, I met Sangi, my school friend at the club. May she live 100 years! The morning I thought of her and there she was. Sangi is a practicing gynecologist and a very dear friend. As the resort festivities continued, I excused myself from the office. We found a cozy corner at the Cabana. I jumped straight to the point and sought her views on baby planning.
She cleared one of the major doubts about fertility. I found out what was probably wrong. Otherwise, I would have received endless diagnostic tests and prescriptions. I knew that the average menstrual cycle is 28 days. If I ovulate around day 14, then my most fertile days are days 12, 13, and 14. But what if my menstrual cycle is not 28 days? Yes, right now I am not that young, besides I always had irregular periods even as a teenager. Sangi helped to clarify this crucial concept.
She also told me the story of a couple in their early thirties. The couple was trying for over three years but were not able to conceive. Their tests indicated no apparent problems. She knew that couple’s family well. The younger brother of the husband had a baby boy within a year of getting married. Probably the sheer pressure of getting pregnant was coming in their way amongst many other reasons beyond our comprehension. “By age 35, your odds of conceiving after 3 months of trying are just about 12%. It may take time, there is no reason to get disheartened”. She further emphasized the need to relax more and be happy. She explained how the Stress hormones, such as cortisol and epinephrine negatively affect one's fertility. “Find what works for you to keep stress at bay. For that, there’s no one solution that fits all. But do it, it’s important,” she said.
Sangi returned to her family, anxiously waiting for her at the dinner table. Although physically exhausted, I felt calmer and relaxed. Her reassurance brought me to a state of bliss beyond words. I feel blessed to have this sisterhood of mothers to guide me in the right direction.